Dear Friend!
I’m so excited that you are considering adoption. I am also very happy that you are looking at Sharlie and Andy as the potential parents of your child.
I am the birthmom of their son, Tavin. When I was looking for a couple to pick Sharlie and Andy caught my eye for a few reasons. First reason is that they have a previous connection with open adoption and knew a little how it works. Second is that they were and are genuinely interested in me as a person. I asked them a million questions, which they were more than happy to answer, but they always asked me questions in return. Sometimes those questions would be related to things I had asked and sometimes not. Eventually it was just a conversation between us that I looked forward to.
There was one moment in particular that made me know that I was and will always be important. Labor for me was 27 and a half hours, Sharlie and Andy stayed with me for the whole time. They slept on the floor of the hospital. Andy went to a store to get me food that I wanted to eat so when I could eat it would be there. Sharlie fought with the nurses to get me anything to eat and they did eventually give me jello and popsicles. Sharlie stayed in the room with me and my mom during delivery and then there was the moment I will never forget. Tavin had been born cleaned up and I was cleaned up too. My mother told Sharlie that she could go get Andy so he could see the baby if she wanted to. Sharlie looked at me and then my mom and asked, “Can I just stay here with Nettie?” I will never forget that. I knew that I was loved and thought of.
In the years that have passed I have gotten to spend time with them on different occasions. When they have come out to where I live we have spent the afternoon in the park. When Tavin was sealed to them I was there for when they got out of the temple. I went out to where they are another summer just for some vacation time. They send me postcards around the holidays which I adore. We still chat occasionally via email or text.
I love Sharlie and Andy so much. I am personally very grateful for all the love they have for Tavin. I know that he is very well taken care of and adored. I am very grateful for their love for me and making sure that I am still included in small ways.
Best of wishes to you in the adventure you are beginning.
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Tavin's birthmother gave this poem (below) to me the day she told us that she had chosen us to adopt her son. It was such and amazing day and of course Andy and I were both bawling! I admire her for her strength, eternal outlook and the amazing gift she gave our family. I can never thank her enough for making it "our turn."
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Your Turn
Some of us can be mothers
Some of us physically can not
Some of us make mistakes
Some of us are obedient
Some of us wish we could be ready
Some of us have the necessary preparation
Sometimes we make mistakes
Sometimes someone else gets blessed
Sometimes we may not be ready
Sometimes we finally get our turn
Sometimes we can be mothers
Sometimes we leave it in God’s hands
Today God would like to reward you through me
Today I have made the mistakes
Today God will take that mistake
Today God will make it your blessing
Today God knows your righteous preparations
Today we would like to make you a Mother
Some of us physically can not
Some of us make mistakes
Some of us are obedient
Some of us wish we could be ready
Some of us have the necessary preparation
Sometimes we make mistakes
Sometimes someone else gets blessed
Sometimes we may not be ready
Sometimes we finally get our turn
Sometimes we can be mothers
Sometimes we leave it in God’s hands
Today God would like to reward you through me
Today I have made the mistakes
Today God will take that mistake
Today God will make it your blessing
Today God knows your righteous preparations
Today we would like to make you a Mother
